Give me patience....

Okay, so I've entered a couple juried events and turned in an application to a shop that has a pretty tight acceptance criteria! I'm so excited, nervous, anxious, and yes, impatient! I so hope I get accepted, and yet, as an artist, and the person I am, feel that's a cop out, as I shouldn't feel I need acceptance to be or do what I do, and yet, down deep, I want, no need that acceptance! I mean, isn't that what we all want? Acceptance with what we do, by people around us, peers, friends, acquaintances, etc? I try to not worry about being accepted, but as an artist and a person I truly want nothing more! Maybe it's a flaw? I only say that because no matter how many times I get hurt or turned down, I still feel the primal need to be accepted! I keep turning in applications and keep wearing my heart on my sleeve! As many times as I have told myself to toughen up, I struggle with the fact that if I do would be to change the core being of who I am, and no matter what, I like who I am and what I do, so I remain, creating, being me, and wearing my heart on my sleeve, or if you will, my heart on my art! And as I write this blog that started out as a way for me to curb my impatience and perhaps ask those who read these for so form of acceptance, that which I battle with, and yet, I have made a discovery as I write this. I have discovered how intertwined art and life truly are, I suppose I knew they were, but to see the direct correlations of art to life, I realize, to be a true artist, friend, lover, mother, or whatever you hope to be in life, you must be happy with who you are, what you do, what you create, before anyone else can accept you, and if you are true to yourself, along the way, you will get to where you want to go with your art and you will meet those people along the way who appreciate you for the real you and they won't expect you to hide or cover up the heart you wear on your sleeve and your art! And so, I remain, being me, true, creative, hopeful, honest, artsy, loving, and yes, IMPATIENT!!!!